A freebie for someone's birthday, with bonus points for high fashion. Petra von Kant is a fashion designer who, during a particularly icy birthday party, tells the world that her new lover is a woman. Then, one day, said lover returns home to her husband.

– You have a good figure. You could use it to your advantage. Get in touch with me some time. – I'd love to.

With its exuberant costumes and set design, a Greek chorus of mannequins, and Sirk-ish larger- than-life melodrama, Fassbinder's Die bitteren Tränen der Petra von Kant delves deep into the absurdities of love and fancy.

A [favourite] Billy Zane film for his birthday (1966).

“This future of yours Shelmerdine, when it's gonna begin? Today? Or, is it always tomorrow?”

– Orlando

As ordered by Queen Elizabeth I (Quentin Crisp), nobleman Orlando remains young and traverses exotic scenery, civilisations, time, and gender.

“Yes, it's story time on WJAD in the heart of Times Square, New York, New York. The city so nice, they named it twice.”

– Johnny LaGuardia, on the air

“Sal? Ready to go?”

– Sonny

“Matto, caldo, soldi, morto… girotondo…”

– Ah, regarde, c'est Tati ! – Tati qui? – Tati, comme Mon Oncle.

“I think it's really rotten of them to lock you up like this for making love to a boy.”

– Thomas Manzoni