“It has been a good day for everyone, even for God. No sign of rain. No evidence of disease or blood.”

“I'm a man in search of his true self. How archetypically American can you get?”

– Eddie Jessup

Bandages for that day in 1924 when Howard Carter came across Tutankhamun's sarcophagus.

“You'll feel better soon. Once you're used to the mask, you'll be a new man — one with no records, no past. A mind invisible to the world.”

– psychiatrist

A really silly tradition for Festivus.

“Sloane! Be lucky!”

– Paul Gregory

“What is that? What is that I hear? Where's it coming from? I hear a siren, but I don't see any fire, I don't see any smoke. Whenever there's a siren, it means there's a fire, but I don't see any smoke. That siren. Where is it coming from? Where's that sound coming from?”

– Santa Claus

A backyard, deck or fences for Daniel LaRusso's (the Karate Kid kid who, as part of his martial arts training, endlessly paints fences) birthday.

“What drives me insane is the twofold nature of this nymphet, of every nymphet perhaps, this mixture in my Lolita of tender, dreamy childishness and a kind of eerie vulgarity. I know it is madness to keep this journal, but it gives me a strange thrill to do so. And only a loving wife could decipher my microscopic script.”

– Prof. Humbert Humbert

“I don't need a card to figure out who I am. I already know.”

– Jack Burns

“The mattress is soft and there're hangers in the closet and stationary with “Bates' Motel” printed on it in case you want to make your friends back home envious.”

– Norman Bates